You said forever. 

To infinity and beyond. To the moon and back. 

Forever meant everything. It meant bones and meant peace and it meant war. It meant you it meant me. It meant making sense of your bones and why they are what you are. 

Forever meant in between.  In between me and her.In between her and them I was a distraction…. forever. 

And yet somehow I choose your forever over mine. 

For forever for me will be satisfied with the in between today and never. 

It means tasting hell  when I have the option of heaven. 

It means provocation .

It is never wanting to see the  full picture. If you aren’t the frame. The portrait. The image

It is the thousand hearts I will break in preparation for you.For a queen would rather her king’s seat remain vacant than to allow a peasant to occupy the it. 

It’s the 3am’s when my drunk legs move to your house. It’s the hand that betrays me everyday and knocks your doors. It’s my lips and how they kiss you. It’s true some infinites are greater than others. That’s why it feels like I haven’t kissed you in forever. …

And now you’ve wrecked me No one will kiss me and not taste you.  No one will have me and not have you. I will not shout any other name  but yours. 

And I do not remember ** years of my life. Because nothing that came before you mattered, it is as though I did not exist until you saw me.    

And when I die, they will ask for a summary of my existence.  And it will be you. You have been my strength my weakness. The weathers of my life, form birth to death. 

But fuck you… 


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